Quotes tagged ‘Sex’

“Dee: Are you actually gonna throw away all your convictions for a chance to get laid? Dennis: I don't really have any convictions.”

— Charlie Day, Rob McElhenney, Dennis Reynolds, Glenn Howerton, imdb.com

“I hate listening to people's dreams. It is like flipping through a stack of photographs. If I'm not in any of them and nobody is having sex, I just don't care.”

— Charlie Day, Rob McElhenney, Dennis Reynolds, Glenn Howerton, imdb.com

“I won't be back to normal 'til I see what your nipples look like!”

— Elisabeth Kiernan Averick, Nathaniel Plimpton, Scott Michael Foster, imdb.com

“Unfortunately, I wanna have sex with you. Don't know what happened, maybe you lost some weight. For some reason, you're now on the top of my to-do list. Let's get this over with so I can focus on other tasks.”

— Elisabeth Kiernan Averick, Nathaniel Plimpton, Scott Michael Foster, imdb.com

“It's what my father always told me, that if I ever tried to make something of myself, that no man would want me and so, I mean, just like the minute that I try to pursue my dreams, my husband 'accidentally' falls into another woman's vagina!”

— Rachel Specter, Audrey Wauchope, Paula Proctor, Donna Lynne Champlin, imdb.com

“We can't undo, can't make amends. Dysfunction is our lingua franca. We can't unscrew each other's friends - we're Jerry Springer not Casablanca. There's hard-to-get, then there's neglect - to say it's fate, you'd have to be a bit slow! Not to be crass, but this sucks ass. This was a shit show.”

— Erin Ehrlich, Greg Serrano, Santino Fontana, imdb.com

“Now, it's true, I'm not gay. I, Darryl Whitefeather, I like both sexes. I'm a bothsexual!”

— Rachel Bloom, Aline Brosh McKenna, Darryl Whitefeather, Pete Gardner, imdb.com

“I do other things that are sinful. I've had premarital sex, lots of it. And sometimes I watch adult content and take care of myself, and I don't mean in the vitamins/exercise kind of way.”

— Michael Hitchcock, Josh Chan, Vincent Rodriguez III, imdb.com

“Valencia: I actually don't have a lot of girlfriends. The last time I had a solid crew was in high school, but then they all got jealous because I got these amazing boobs, and they were still trolls, and so they spread all these rumors that I, like, slept with the English teacher. Rebecca: No! Valen…”

— Rachel Bloom, Aline Brosh McKenna, Valencia Perez, Gabrielle Ruiz, imdb.com

“Oh child, no one ever plans on having sex. And I can't be your mother and your conscience. I'm not always going to be here to protect you. You are a good looking young man. And soon, you are going to want to start exploring. But you gotta make smart choices.”

— Steven Canals, Brad Falchuk, Ryan Murphy, Blanca Rodriguez, Mj Rodriguez, imdb.com

“If you believe that abortion should only be permissible in cases of rape or incest, don’t pretend it’s about ‘life’. If it’s ok so long as she was raped, what you’re saying is that women should be punished for consenting to sex by forcing them to give birth.”

— Laurie Penny, twitter.com

“Sex, in other words, is a key way we express ourselves as queer people, and we’re lucky enough to be part of a community at the vanguard of sexual expression.”

— Alexander Cheves, them.us

“President: Here's the adventure: some kind of alien goo-ga has infested the Kennedy Sex Tunnels. I want it hunted down and taken out. Morty: Kennedy Sex Tunnels? President: Naturally you'll forget you saw them, along with, in order of national embarrassment: the Truman Cocaine Lounge, the McKinley H…”

— Justin Roiland, Dan Harmon, Morty Smith (voice), Justin Roiland, imdb.com

“You got some of that mermaid puss.”

— Dan Guterman, Ryan Ridley, Rick Sanchez (voice), Justin Roiland, imdb.com

“[they both exchange kisses, upping their sexual arousal] Unity: Yes, Rick, yes! Yes, yes! Rick: Wait, wait, stop! H-Hold it! Not like this. We need a hang glider, and a crotchless Uncle Sam costume, and I want the entire field of your largest stadium covered end to end with naked redheads, and I wan…”

— Ryan Ridley, Justin Roiland, Dan Harmon, Rick Sanchez (voice), Justin Roiland, imdb.com

“I love watching bukkake. I mean, like, I don't know if I would personally ever do it.”

— Ryan Ridley, Tom Kauffman, Justin Roiland, Dan Harmon, Tammy, Cassie Steele, imdb.com

“Jerry: It sounds like you're about to say Jacob is your lover. Leonard Smith: No, no, no. Jacob is your mother's lover. I watch them. Sometimes from a chair, sometimes from a closet. Almost always dressed as Superman.”

— Tom Kauffman, Justin Roiland, Dan Harmon, Jerry Smith (voice), Chris Parnell, imdb.com

“Beth: When two people create a life together, they set aside their previous lives as individuals. Jerry: Gimme a break! We're not heroes for having unprotected sex on prom night.”

— Justin Roiland, Tom Kauffman, Jerry Smith (voice), Chris Parnell, imdb.com

“60 for the resonator, and my grandson wants the sex robot.”

— Justin Rolland, Dan Harmon, Rick Sanchez, Justin Roiland, imdb.com

“You know, if we do hook up tonight, for once, you won't be the only one thinking about J.D.”

— Andy Schwartz, Carla Espinosa, Judy Reyes, imdb.com