Season

Season 7

by Larry David, Jerry Seinfeld, Andy Ackerman, Mailon Rivera, Wayne Knight and 142 others

Season seven of Seinfeld, an American comedy television series created by Jerry Seinfeld and Larry David, began airing on September 21, 1995, and concluded on May 16, 1996, on NBC.

(83 total)

Characters

Jerry Seinfeld (45)Larry David (23)George Costanza (21)Jason Alexander (21)Peter Mehlman (15)Gregg Kavet (13)Andy Robin (13)Cosmo Kramer (11)Michael Richards (11)Spike Feresten (10)

“He's not a Nazi. He just happens to be a little eccentric. Most geniuses are.”

— Spike Feresten, Cosmo Kramer, Michael Richards, imdb.com

Tagged: Soup, Nazis, Soup Nazi, Geniuses, Eccentric People

“Oh, we all get a little cuckoo sometimes, George. I used to be like you. Rating personnel ’tll they cried, calling managers on the field during a game, threatening to move the team to New Jersey, just to upset people. Then I found a way to relax. I've got two words to say to you, George: hot tub.”

— Gregg Kavet, Andy Robin, George Steinbrenner, Larry David, imdb.com

Tagged: Hot Tubs, Jacuzzis, New Jersey, Threats, Relaxation

“You can't eat this soup standing up; your knees buckle.”

— Spike Feresten, Jerry Seinfeld, Jerry Seinfeld, imdb.com

Tagged: Soup, Nazis, food, Foodie

“You tell that son of a bitch no Yankee is ever comin' to Houston! Not as long as you bastards are running things.”

— Gregg Kavet, Andy Robin, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

Tagged: Profanity, Houston, Houston Astros, New York Yankees, Son of a Bitch

“Yeah! That's how they talk. You know, everyone's either a bastard or a son of a bitch. Yeah, it's like, uh, ‘Boy, that son of a bitch Boggs can really hit, uh?!’”

— Gregg Kavet, Andy Robin, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

Tagged: Son of a Bitch, Bastard, Wade Boggs, Profanity, Obscenity

“Ohhh, I'm exhausted. I've been on this street a thousand times! It's never looked so strange! The faces...so cold! In the distance, a child is crying. Fatherless...a bastard child, perhaps. My back aches...my heart aches...but my feet...my feet are resilient! (Thank God I took off my heels, and put…”

— Gregg Kavet, Andy Robin, Elaine Benes, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, imdb.com

Tagged: Advertising, Catalogs, Walking Shoes, Bastard, Exhaustion

“I always look annoyed. Yeah, when you look annoyed all the time, people think that you're busy.”

— Gregg Kavet, Andy Robin, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

Tagged: annoyed, Looking Busy

“Salad! What was I thinking? Women don't respect salad eaters.”

— Tom Gammill, Max Pross, Tom Gammill and Max Pross, Jerry Seinfeld, Jerry Seinfeld, imdb.com

Tagged: Salad, Masculinity, Women, Veganism

“I'd rather be dating the blind. You know you could let the house go. You could let yourself go. A good-looking blind woman doesn't even know you're not good enough for her.”

— Tom Gammill, Max Pross, Tom Gammill and Max Pross, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

Tagged: Dating, blind dates, Blind People, Sloppiness, Deaf People

“You put the balm on? Who told you to put the balm on? I didn't tell you to put the balm on. Why'd you put the balm on? You haven't even been to see the doctor. If you’re gonna put a balm on, let a doctor put a balm on.”

— Larry David, Jackie Chiles, Phil Morris, imdb.com

Tagged: Balm, Lawsuits, Ambulance Chasers

“Yeah, that's going to be a problem. It's gonna be a problem for them. This a clear violation of your rights as a consumer. It's an infringement on your constitutional rights. It's outrageous, egregious, preposterous.”

— Larry David, Jackie Chiles, Phil Morris, imdb.com

Tagged: Lawyers, Lawsuits, Constitution, rights, Consumer Rights

“A young lady I know, let's call her Elaine, happened to find herself overwhelmed with feelings of resentment and hostility for her friend, let's call him George. She felt that George was somewhat of a loser and that she was the one who deserved to be married first. She also happened to mention to me…”

— Larry David, Rabbi Glickman, Bruce Mahler, imdb.com

Tagged: resentment, Hostility, Secrets, prostitution, losers

“You didn't have makeup sex? How could you not have makeup sex? I mean that's the best feature of the heavy relationship.”

— Larry David, Jerry Seinfeld, Jerry Seinfeld, imdb.com

Tagged: Breakups, arguments, Sex, Makeup Sex, Relationshps

“It's very difficult. Few men have the constitution for it. That's why breakups take two or three tries. You gotta build up your immunity.”

— Larry David, Jerry Seinfeld, Jerry Seinfeld, imdb.com

Tagged: Breakups, Immunity

“You see those tears streaming down, you don't know what to do. It was like she was on fire and I was trying to put her out.”

— Larry David, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

Tagged: Breakups, Crying, Tantrums, manipulation, Guilt

“Spring. Rejuvenation. Rebirth. Everything's blooming. All that crap.”

— Larry David, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

Tagged: Springtime, Flowers, Rebirth, Rejuvenation

“It can never be erased. It'll follow us wherever we go for the rest of our lives. I'll never be able to get a job. I mean, doesn't that concern you? Everything I've worked for...down the drain because of one stupid mistake. I mean, aren't we entitled to make one mistake in our lives, Jerry?”

— Larry David, Cosmo Kramer, Michael Richards, imdb.com

Tagged: Kidnapping, Criminal Record, Social Stigma, Shame, Fall From Grace

“They're prisons. Manmade prisons. You're doing time. You get up in the morning. She's there. You go to sleep at night. She's there. It's like you gotta ask permission to use the bathroom. ‘Is it all right if I use the bathroom now?’”

— Larry David, Cosmo Kramer, Michael Richards, imdb.com

Tagged: Marriage, Prison, Submission, Boredom, bathroom

“I will never understand the bathrooms in this country. Why is it that the doors on the stalls do not come all the way down to the floor?”

— Larry David, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

Tagged: bathrooms, Bathroom Doors, inventions, Privacy

“And you broke up with her 'cuz she beat you at chess? That's pretty sick.”

— Larry David, Jerry Seinfeld, Jerry Seinfeld, imdb.com

Tagged: Breakups, Chess