Show

Seinfeld

by Larry Charles, Elaine Benes, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, Tom Cherones, Barbara Stock and 696 others

Seinfeld is an American television sitcom that originally aired on NBC from July 5, 1989, to May 14, 1998. It lasted nine seasons, and is now in syndication. It was created by Larry David and Jerry Seinfeld, the latter starring as a fictionalized version

(684 total)

Seasons

Season 1 (15)Season 2 (55)Season 3 (101)Season 4 (109)Season 5 (97)Season 6 (82)Season 7 (83)Season 8 (79)Season 9 (59)

Characters

Jerry Seinfeld (476)Larry David (265)Jason Alexander (179)George Costanza (179)Michael Richards (99)Cosmo Kramer (99)Larry Charles (92)Peter Mehlman (91)Elaine Benes (59)Julia Louis-Dreyfus (59)

“Oh, you think you're better than me? Go ahead, pick out anything in the room here. I'll lift it up over my head.”

— Steve Koren, Izzy Mandelbaum, Jr., Gene Dynarski, imdb.com

Tagged: Machismo, Bravado

“Oh yeah, that's right. Go. Put us all in the hospital. And you've ruined our business with all your macho head games.”

— Steve Koren, Izzy Mandelbaum, Lloyd Bridges, imdb.com

Tagged: macho, Head Games, Bravado

“Think you're better than me, huh?”

— Steve Koren, Izzy Mandelbaum, Lloyd Bridges, imdb.com

Tagged: Bravado

“If she can't find me, she can't break up with me.”

— David Mandel, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

Tagged: Breakups, Avoidance, Ghosting

“Jerry, you have tendencies. They're always annoying, but they were just tendencies. But now, if you can't kiss this girl, I'm afraid we're talking disorder.”

— Steve O'Donnell, Dan O'Keeffe, Elaine Benes, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, imdb.com

Tagged: Germophobia, ocd, Tendencies, Psychological Disorders

“There you are, Elaine. Go forth and create. And, by the way, when you get to that chapter about my romantic escapades—feel free to toss yourself in the mix.”

— Darin Henry, J. Peterman, John O'Hurley, imdb.com

Tagged: biography, fiction, Lust

“I don't think I'll ever be able to forget Susie—ahhh. And most of all, I will never forget that one night. Working late on the catalog. Just the two of us. And we surrendered to temptation. And it was pretty good.”

— David Mandel, J. Peterman, John O'Hurley, imdb.com

Tagged: funerals, Passion, Fables, fiction

“The ocean called. They're running outta shrimp.”

— Gregg Kavet, Andy Robin, Reilly, Joel Polis, imdb.com

Tagged: Comebacks, Zingers

“This is my one chance to make a great entrance! My whole life, I have never made a great entrance!”

— David Mandel, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

Tagged: balls, Entrances

“Yeah, because you're perfect. You're a calculating, coldhearted businesswoman. And when there's dirty work to be done, you don't mind stomping on a few throats.”

— Gregg Kavet, Andy Robin, Cosmo Kramer, Michael Richards, imdb.com

Tagged: Coldhearted, Dirty Work, Machiavellian, Cutthroat

“I had a dream last night that a hamburger was eating me!”

— Darin Henry, Jerry Seinfeld, Jerry Seinfeld, imdb.com

Tagged: Dreams, Surreal, Hamburgers

“Sometimes in life, the gods smile upon you, my friends.”

— Gregg Kavet, Andy Robin, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

Tagged: Zingers, Sick Burns, Comeuppance, Revenge, Fate

“Trust me, Kramer. Given the legal opportunity, I will kill you.”

— Gregg Kavet, Andy Robin, Jerry Seinfeld, Jerry Seinfeld, imdb.com

Tagged: Threats, Murder

“You were completely right. I sleep so much better when I'm alone. And you scream in your sleep.”

— Peter Mehlman, Emily, Sarah Silverman, imdb.com

Tagged: Sleeping, Sleeping Alone, Insomnia

“Listen to the comeback. ‘Oh yeah? Well the jerk store called. They're running outta you.’”

— Gregg Kavet, Andy Robin, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

Tagged: Comebacks, Zingers, Sick Burns

“As much as I'd like to see the two of you living it up in a warm, tropical setting, I, I would just miss you too much. So I've decided I want you to stay.”

— Peter Mehlman, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

Tagged: Parents, Empty Nest, Florida, New York

“I couldn't get there in time to stop it, but you should have seen Little Jerry, Jerry! Flappin' his wings and struttin' his stuff! He was peckin' and weavin' and bobbin' and talkin' trash! He didn't even have to touch him! The other rooster ran out of the ring. The whole fight lasted two seconds.”

— Jennifer Crittenden, Cosmo Kramer, Michael Richards, imdb.com

Tagged: Cockfighting, Little Jerry Seinfeld, Talking Trash

“Jerry, it's three-thirty in the morning. I'm at a cockfight. What am I clinging to?”

— Jennifer Crittenden, Elaine Benes, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, imdb.com

Tagged: Cockfights, Marriage, Adulting

“Are you saying that I could be dating this hair? With you under it?”

— Jennifer Crittenden, Elaine Benes, Julia Louis-Dreyfus, imdb.com

Tagged: Baldness, Shaved Heads, hair

“I've tried it straight, Jerry. We've all seen the results. For me, sick is the only way to go.”

— Jennifer Crittenden, George Costanza, Jason Alexander, imdb.com

Tagged: Ex-Cons, Dysfunctional Relationships, Dating