Show

American Dad!

The series focuses on an eccentric motley crew that is the Smith family and their three housemates: Father, husband, and breadwinner Stan Smith; his better half housewife, Francine Smith; their college-aged daughter, Hayley Smith; and their high-school-ag

(134 total)

“Doctors are stupid, Roger. They're just failed dentists.”

— Joe Chandler, Nic Wegener, Stan Smith (voice), Seth MacFarlane, imdb.com

Tagged: doctors, Stupid, Failure, Dentists

“Without the crisscross, I'm just some guy yelling 'applesauce.'”

— Nic Wegener, Joe Chandler, Roger The Alien, Seth MacFarlane, imdb.com

Tagged: Jump rope, Crisscross, Applesauce, kids games, Fun

“Roger: I once survived four days in a Del Taco parking lot extracting life-saving nutrients from puddles and bird shit. Steve: Why didn't you just go into the Del Taco? Roger: I'm a Taco Bell man.”

— Zachary Rosenblatt, Roger The Alien, Seth MacFarlane, imdb.com

Tagged: survivial, Tacos, Life Or death, Nutrients, Life saving

“No, Dad, crazy baloney is real. It's called pepperoni.”

— Greg Cohen, Steve Smith (voice), Scott Grimes, imdb.com

Tagged: Pepperoni, crazy, Baloney, real

“Stan: Look out, world, God and Stan are back together again! Roger: It's not official 'til you change your Facebook status!”

— Greg Cohen, Roger The Alien, Seth MacFarlane, imdb.com

Tagged: God, Facebook, Facebook Official, back together

“A cake gets messed up. A Quiznos bathroom gets messed up. You destroyed a galaxy, mother.”

— Parker Deay, Jordan Blum, Stan Smith (voice), Seth MacFarlane, imdb.com

Tagged: Messed Up, Destroyed, galaxy, Cake, bathroom

“When I have a baby, I'm going to name it 'Recycle.'”

— Jeff Kauffmann, Nic Wegener, Joe Chandler, Hayley Smith (voice), Rachael MacFarlane, imdb.com

Tagged: Baby, Baby Name, recycle, Hippie

“Stan, we can't have a grown woman acting like a child in our house. This ain't no Disney Channel.”

— Jeff Kauffmann, Teresa Hsiao, Francine Smith (voice), Wendy Schaal, imdb.com

Tagged: Child, grown woman, Disney Channel, Acting

“Seizure my ass.”

— Erik Durbin, Klaus (voice), Dee Bradley Baker, imdb.com

Tagged: ass, Command, Seizure

“I'M HUNGRY TO FINISH MY FORT!”

— Ali Waller, Steve Smith (voice), Scott Grimes, imdb.com

Tagged: Fort, Anger, Frustration, Yelling

“A real New York hotel! How many Wall Street bankers have had their first prostitute here?”

— Kirk J. Rudell, Francine Smith (voice), Wendy Schaal, imdb.com

Tagged: New York, Wall Street, Bankers, Sex, hotels

“Steve, I'm very disappointed that you used that language with your mother. That being said, I'm more excited for dinner than I have been in years.”

— Ali Waller, Stan Smith (voice), Seth MacFarlane, imdb.com

Tagged: Cursing, Excited, Eventful, Parenthood, Dinner

“Face to neck. Hand to lower back. Pec to boob? I don't know shit about hugging.”

— Rachael Bogert, Emily Wood, Steve Smith (voice), Scott Grimes, imdb.com

Tagged: hugs, Hugging, Unsure, Insecure, awkward

“Everyone knows blondes get more attention. Scientists have proven it, but their research was ignored because they were boring brown-haired scientists.”

— Emily Wood, Rachael Bogert, Carlo Hart, Evan Sandman, Roger The Alien, Seth MacFarlane, imdb.com

Tagged: Blondes, Brunettes, Science, Research, Boring

“Roger's Spot wasn't always one of America's highest revenue generating casual dining experiences. It actually started out as a kind of place where you could trade your child support check for booze.”

— Robert Maitia, Brett Cawley, Charles Suozzi, John Unholz, Roger The Alien, Seth MacFarlane, imdb.com

Tagged: Child Support, booze, Dining, Trade

“Hayley: Jeez, Steve. Four gallons of Lubriderm? Steve: You try living with eczema.”

— Ali Waller, John Unholz, Brett Cawley, Stan Smith (voice), Seth MacFarlane, imdb.com

Tagged: Eczema, A large quantity, Skin Condition

“Hayley: [after the cab crashes] Did the cabbie survive? Stan: No. Damn fool was driving sober.”

— John Unholz, Robert Maitia, Ali Waller, Brett Cawley, Stan Smith (voice), Seth MacFarlane, imdb.com

Tagged: Car Crash, Cabs, Sober, Driving, Drunk Driving

“Gummi Bears?! He replaced my bullets with Gummi Bears from the mini bar! That's gonna cost me $7!”

— Robert Maitia, Brett Cawley, John Unholz, Ali Waller, Stan Smith (voice), Seth MacFarlane, imdb.com

Tagged: Gummi Bears, Gun, Mini Bar, Money, expensive

“It's called 'Fortress of Solitude.' Not 'Fortress of Come on In.'”

— Ali Waller, John Unholz, Robert Maitia, Brett Cawley, Steve Smith (voice), Scott Grimes, imdb.com

Tagged: Fortress, Sassy, Alone, annoyed

“I don't wanna be around all these babies playing Pokémon, badly. This kid right here is just wasting his Charizard. [to the kid] You are wasting your Charizard!”

— Ali Waller, John Unholz, Robert Maitia, Brett Cawley, Stan Smith (voice), Seth MacFarlane, imdb.com

Tagged: Kids Table, upset, Pokemon, babies, Old